I
was tired, hungry, and a worn out from school. Today just wasn’t one of those days, I thought to myself as I
opened the refrigerator. Eighth grade was very stressful for me, especially
when I was taking all advanced classes and extracurricular activities. Deadline
after deadline. Project after project. My head started to spin just thinking
about it. Things couldn’t get worse than
this, I thought while I began to eat a bag of chips.
I
was working away on my tedious math project, when I heard my mother race down
the stairs practically throwing herself into the kitchen. She was beaming from
ear to ear!
“Gracelyn, I have wonderful news! I just got
back from Titus’ teacher conference, then I bumped into one of his friend’s
mother. She told me that she decided to home school her child instead of letting
him go to middle school next year,” she said.
“How
is this wonderful news?” I asked questioningly.
“Well
I wasn’t completely sure if was going to let Titus go to middle school next
year. So I had an idea if Dad and I put Titus, Brooke, and you in home school
together. That way you could finish high school faster and even graduate early,”
she carefully explained waiting for my reaction. My heart stopped, the chips
felt like they were coming back up. I couldn’t believe my ears. My facial
expressions froze like icicles.
“Listen
honey, it was just a thought,” she pleaded, “We are still thinking about it.”
I
instantly relaxed. “Whew, you scared me for a minute,” I answered. After that
my mom changed the subject, and the homeschool situation faded away.
A
few weeks later the topic came back again. Now my mother would talk about it
ALL the time; giving my family and I everything we could possibly grasp about
homeschool education. How the schedule is so flexible and how we could finish
school faster. She just kept going on and on. I was eventually getting worried.
My high school dream was literally slipping from my mind!
Since
I was in kindergarten, I would dream of becoming a teenager and when the movie
“High School Musical” came out, I knew in my heart that I wanted to be just
like them. I desperately wanted to enjoy the “high school experience”. It seems
silly now, but I was only eight years old when I made up my mind. Obviously,
“High School Musical” is nothing like an actual high school. There is no random
singing and dancing in real high school, and in real high school there is
bullying, drugs and peer pressure. But I didn’t care about that.
Whenever
my mother would bring up the topic, I would either ignore or try to change the
subject. Secretly I hoped she would forget about this horrible home school idea.
In fact, whenever the fear came to my mind, I would push it away. I didn’t want
any part of homeschooling. I was walking on thin ice. Fearing that I would
become a social outcast; if I didn’t go to public school like the other kids in
my neighborhood. Honestly, I thought home school would be staying in the house all
day, listen to a teacher communicate through a computer and have no peer
interaction at all.
The
home school idea would waiver around like a ghost. Sometimes it would come out and
scare me and other times I would just forget about it. But the idea just kept
coming back. If my mother wasn’t talking about, I would see a commercial about
it on television, I would even hear people talk about. It would NEVER go away.
I felt like I was running from an ax murderer that was stalking me wherever I went.
Suddenly,
three days before my high school experience, my parents changed their mind.
They were tired of calling the k12 people and being put on hold. They just gave
up and I was completely grateful. I felt like I could accomplish anything; even
though I really didn’t do anything except hope and pray. My mother even went to
shop for school clothes and school supplies. Things were looking ahead for me.
But then, the morning of the last day of
summer, my parents called my siblings and I to their bedroom. My mother looked
apprehensive. “What’s wrong Mom?” my little brother finally asked. She slowly
explained that she had a terrible nightmare about the schools we were about to
attend. She carefully clarified that she believes that God is giving her a
warning, to put us back into home school. I was completely devastated! I broke
down sobbing, angry with God for not giving me what I wanted, and angry with my
parents for listening to him. I couldn’t comprehend why God didn’t answer my
prayers.
Unexpectedly,
I remembered the Bible verse Psalms 91:3 “He will keep you
safe from all hidden dangers and from all deadly
diseases”. Maybe God is protecting me
from something I cannot understand, I just have to trust him I thought.
Honestly, it wasn’t easy. I had my ups and downs, but I kept moving forward.
Soon I realized that k12 wasn’t as bad as I thought. My mother was right.
Homeschooling is very flexible and easy.
Rapidly, I found myself enjoying home school. I soon made friends in school
and outside of school and my grades were extraordinary. Now looking back on how
I reacted when my parents told me the news, I acted totally immature and overly
dramatic. In fact I only cared about myself, but not how homeschooling will benefit
my parents and my little brother, Titus. I now know that it isn’t the end of the world,
if I don’t get my way. I just need to trust in Jesus because he can see the big
picture.
